Of course, I knew it was going to be a strange day. I woke up this morning on a dance floor, and then wore my best friend's clothes to work for christssake.

As I mushed on toward the hospital, I heard a small cartoon voice in my head say "Why, with an UNLIMITED supply of food, I can finally fill that empty void I'm feeling." It may have come from the radio.

Then, when I pulled into the underground parking lot, I saw a kelly green bumper sticker on the back of a car that said "Proud Grandparents of a Lumberjack".

Meanwhile, my cell phone number formerly belonged to a business. People keep calling me saying "Moving is easy?" "Moving is E-Z?" "Uhm, is this..."

On top of the delerium tremors, I'm loosin' it.